Monday, May 9, 2011

Monster-In-Law

Remember the movie starring Jennifer Lopez and Jane Fonda?
Well my relationship with my soon to be mother-in-law can kind of equate to that. 
Well not entirely.
My soon to be mother-in-law is no way crazy, or a monster.
But, she is not very fond over the fact that her son and I are getting married.
Well i don't really know whats she mad about.
I think it may be due to the fact that we live together before we are married, 
and that she is somewhat 'hyper-religious' 
Either way, the relationship between us is chaotic to say the least.
More like non existent.
So finally, I have become fed up. 
I can't handle my life being as dramatic as a fiction movie.
I can't handle not being able to share my excitement with her and ask her for her advice.
So.., I am writing her a letter.
A 5 paged letter to be exact.
Well, maybe not, my first draft was 5 pages, but there was a whole lot of emotion in that.
Once I calm down, I will probably be able to make it more mature and appropriate. 
But right now nope.
I kind feel like I am the only one who has difficult relationships with their in-laws.
I know this isn't true. 
But at the moment I feel like it. 
{I just wrote the letter, hence this emotion}
On the bright side.
I had  a terrible bout of insomnia last night, which is no good, but it helped me finish a book that I had been reading for quite sometime.
House of Night: Marked
Here is the excerpt from the House of Night site:
"After a Vampire Tracker Marks her with a crescent moon on her forehead, 16-year-old Zoey Redbird enters the House of Night and learns that she is no average fledgling. She has been Marked as special by the vampyre Goddess Nyx and has affinities for all five elements: Air, Fire Water, Earth and Spirit. But she is not the only fledgling at the House of Night with special powers. When she discovers that the leader of the Dark Daughters, the school's most elite club, is mis-using her Goddess-given gifts, Zoey must look deep within herself for the courage to embrace her destiny— with a little help from her new vampyre friends (or Nerd Herd, as Aphrodite calls them)."
 So I started reading these series after a recommendation from a fellow blogger. It kind of ish similar to Twilight, but not really. Same time of genre. 
I though the book was fabulous. I look good bath books or beach books. Books that I don't have to put too much thought into, but that are not so simple it bores me. 
I am beginning to read the second book in this series: Untamed.
Hopefully it will be as good as the first.
I love crossing books off my book list.
Tomorrow looks like another beautiful sunny day, and thankfully I only have to work one shift,
meaning I get to go for a nice long run. 
I am hoping to do about 5 miles but we'll see where the day takes me!!
xoxo.
 

11 comments:

  1. I am sorry, I bet that is awful! I hope you can give her a letter and say what you want to say. My only advice is def to re-read once you've calmed down! Remember you'll be stuck with her at life, probably better not to burn bridges! Just my 2 cents, although I'm not in your situation and def now in your shoes. Good luck, I'm sorry girl!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Good luck with your letter!! I really hope it clears the air between you and your mother in law and that she will put forth some effort into building a GOOD relationship with you!
    You are so freakin' adorable, I don't understand what her problem is. Even if she is overly "religious"..you two ARE getting married!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. wow, i'm so sorry to hear that about your future mother-in-law. I'm sure just sitting down and writing it all down was very good for you to do. Def. don't give her the 5 page letter, but at least ur feelings are out and not being bottled up. What kind of a relationship does your fiance have with his mother? I certainly hope that he backs you up in situations and perhaps he too can help you two become closer. It's def. something you need to work out with her, but that doesn't mean that he shouldn't have a part in bridging that gap, too. I really hope you two can work things out, but you're right, you are certainly not the only one out there who's been in this situation before.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I hope the letter helps! :) That's awful! I don't know what I would do if my mother-in-law to be was like that!

    ReplyDelete
  5. A LOT of people have bed relationships with their soon to be mother-in-laws so you are definitely not alone! I'm so lucky to have a good relationship with my current bf's mom, but it hasn't always been the case in the past.

    If you end up giving her the letter, just try and take some of the emotion out of it and use it as a way to try and develop a better relationship with her... I mean if she actually got to know you, what isn't to like??

    It might also be a good idea to schedule a coffee date just you and her and tell her that you're aware you two done get along, but you're in love with her son and getting married to him, so will probably be sticking around awhile (but in a nice way). If you just bring the issue right out into the open it will probably catch her off guard and if you tell her that you really want you two to have a great relationship, she may just surprise you and open up herself.

    Good luck!

    xoxo
    Jenna

    ReplyDelete
  6. oh dear, i feel for you. My relationship with my mil can be a bit weird. At least she's stopped asking me when we are going to have children because 'won't we be lonely in our old age' after 21 years i think she got the hint i wasn't having a child so that she could take him/her to the park for an hour every other sunday.
    On the bright side i've read those boooks. Like harry potter but for witches great stuff! x

    ReplyDelete
  7. Don't feel bad... it took me a long time to feel comfortable around my mother-in-law. She raised 5 kids on her own starting at 18 years old and had been married and divorced 3 times when I first met her. I was only 19 years old, naive, and marrying her first son. I never felt like she ever liked me, she was always cold, closed off like she had a wall up, and never really talked to me personally. Every time I went over for dinner I would feel so awkward and not like part of the family. It never felt that way to me anyway. Then once I got to know her I started to understand the reasons why she was that way and realized that I needed to stop being so afraid of her and just be myself. We are so much better now. My husband swears she's loved me since day one but I know it took her some time... joining a family can be very difficult and even more disheartening when you feel you are not accepted. I think it's great you are writing a letter to tell her how you feel, I probably should have done the same a long time ago. Just don't take anything personally- she is going through her own trials and I'm not a mother but I can see how difficult it can be to watch your child get married. Mothers can be so protective and I'm sure she doesn't mean to hurt you. You just need to come together and spend some time discussing your relationship so she feels like she is included in your plans. I'm SO rambling- sorry if you are still reading this. I hope it works out with you guys.

    Email me about sponsors (kroberts617@gmail.com)... I had a response all written out but it's a novel and I can't find your email contact!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh gosh! Me and my future MIL are bff's.....my issues are more with the FIL. I think it is great that you are taking an initiative to communicate and work things out.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I am so sorry you and your mil-to be aren't getting along. :( I think it's actually rare when people DO get along with or absolutely LOVE their inlaws. A letter is a great idea. Even if you don't end up giving it to her, I like writing letters to people that are frustrating me then tearing them up. It helps release all that stress. :) Thank you for joining my blog!! :D Made me so happy! You should enter my giveaway! It's exciting! haha!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Girl I know lots of people who have issues with the inlaws... So don't feel alone I'm sure it has nothing to do with you. My parents are a bit tough in that arena as well. It's not that they dont like my bf necessarily, they just don't want us married. Awesome.

    ReplyDelete
  11. that is super mature of you to write her a letter! Good for you, hopefully that will show her that you care!! Hope things get better!

    ReplyDelete

Thank you all for the sweet comments ♥
If you have any specific questions feel free to e-mail me, or leave your e-mail {imperfectobsession@yahoo.com}for a more detailed response!
With love♥