So after work all sickly today,
Beau send me a text that says
"I accidently ate all the shredded cheese on my salad, can you pick up more for the lasagna?"
My first thought was
"How the heck did you use all that cheese"
My second thought was
"Guy is a bottomless pit"
So I popped in a cough drop for my wraspy frog voice and headed to the store.
Well I was cold, it was raining, 95 percent sure I had a fever and my body hurts, so I set off in attempts to find a close spot (I usually park far away).
So I find a spot for someone pulling out, put on my blinker and wait.
Clearly, it was my spot.
After the car pulls out, I notice on the other side another car pulled up and put their blinker on.
My first thought, are you friggen serious?! I was clearly there first.
So what happens? They go for the spot!
The aggressive small car driver that I am, I gunned it and got in the spot.
As I walked into the store, I felt daggers of eyes death glaring me all the way in.
So I pick up the shredded mozzarella cheese, orange juice, more cough drops and cereal and head to the cash register.
As I ring out probably infecting everyone at the cash register, I think to myself how did I not run into dagger eyes.
So I head outside and see dagger eyes parked right behind by car...
So i'm thinking uhmm okay.
So me in my bad ass 4 inch stillettos and fancy blue dress pants & suit jacket and backwards name tag I say:
What seems to be the problem.
Her: You took my f****** spot.
Me: I don't exactly agree with that, I had my blinker on before you were in the row.
Her: Youre a liar (Although sadly I don't think she used the correct version of youre)
Me: Well, I'm not lying but can you please move your car.
Her: Nope
Me: Well then that's going to be an issue.
Her: What are you going to do, call the cops?
Me: Pointing to the sticker in my car from the NYPD (Did I mention my uncles a cop)
Dagger eye girls friend: Oh s***, she is a cop.
Her: Oh man, I am so sorry, I didn't know.
Me: So you would do this to anyone who you don't think is a cop?
Her: No, it won't happen again.
Me: I better not see it again.
Her & Friend: Drive away in shame.
Btw, did I mention that I never even said a single thing about being a cop!?
I literally pointed to the sticker in my windshield!!
Ahahahah.
Oh lord, that was fabulous.
My wraspy throat helped me feel pretty tough which was awesome!!
Moral of the story: Don't be a jerk and park behind people's cars?!
How rude.
xoxo.
